With The Dark Knight Rises finally in theatres, I’m once again able to enjoy watching Bruce Wayne kick some bad guy ass. After seeing the movie twice, instead of writing a critique on what I thought the weak points in this film were, I’m going to write a critique of something that has bothered me since watching Adam West wield a can of shark repellant.
Now I don’t want to doubt the intelligence of the people reading this, but this is where I put the part where there might be SPOILERS. Duh.
My main qualm with Batman, in any form, is the whole mystery part of it. This movie continues to shove the idea of Batman being a symbol down our throats. The idea that Batman could be Joe Somebody, walking down the streets of Gotham beside you at any moment. He could be ANYONE, right?!
Except he really couldn’t be. Look at the shit this guy carries around on his belt. Besides shark repellent (undoubtedly the most useful), he’s got hand-lathed poison-tipped throwing stars in the shape of bats, grappling hooks, finger tasers, collapsible bat sword, and optional sun roof. These aren’t things you can just whip up in your basement. This isn’t some Peter Parker ski-mask bullshit. This is more money than you can count.
So we’ve narrowed it down considerably. This is one of Gotham’s elite. However, you can’t just buy this stuff without having a way for it to be invented. So not only do you need money, you need people. And with the scope of equipment, from the suit to the tanks, you’re going to need an entire enterprise. A metric shit ton of resources. In other words, YOU NEED TO BE BRUCE WAYNE.
If there’s one thing I can’t get past in these films, it’s that NOBODY IN GOTHAM CAN GET THEIR SHIT TOGETHER. Even the damn police commissioner! James Gordon goes through hundreds of Batman comics and a dozen movies and STILL can’t piece together that Bruce Wayne is Batman. I finally realize how organized crime got to be as bad as it is in the first place, what with the Gotham Police running the show. DAMNIT JIM, YOU GUYS ARE LIKE , BEST FRIENDS.
When Batman disappears, so does Bruce Wayne. When Batman comes back 8 years later, SO DOES BRUCE WAYNE. ON DAMN NEAR THE SAME NIGHT. HOW DO PEOPLE NOT RECOGNIZE THIS. HOW CAN PEOPLE BE SO FUCKING STUPID, AND NOT SEE WHAT’S RIGHT IN FRONT OF-
Fuck you, DC.